Southern Gentlemen

I just went to the Carolinas and had the time of my freaking life!  It was beautiful; I LOVED it.  I loved the South, the food, the nature, the architecture, and the people.  I flew into Raleigh and spent the day checking out Duke and UNC Chapel Hill, then had some "barbecue" (no I did not go to a barbecue I had barbecue big difference).  I want to move to the South, I want to have a cute Southern accent and I want to live the simple life.

Now to the good stuff that is semi related to the South.

On the way over I got asked for my number... TWICE!  Can you believe it?!  How many times do you sit next to young guys on your flights, let alone handsome ones, let alone handsome ones who ask for your number.  The first one I liked.  He was a man in uniform, enlisted in the Air Force and he is from New Orleans and had the thickest accent, beautiful eyes, and an incredible smile... he was smoking.  We talked and flirted for the long 30 minute flight to which I think I felt his elbow slash upper arm graze my mid-drif or rib cage (I know I know so PG) a couple times.  While still on the plane he told me "I should get your number, for when I come into SB" (as the Air Force base is about 30-40 minutes away).  He then walked me to my gate and took down my number and texted me his name.  When I was sure he was out of sight and I was about to walk through the gate I sent him what I call a cute and casual text "Easiest flight so far :)".  I know, I know the smiley face; cheesy maybe, did it get my point across? YES.  (We had been talking about how I don't really like to fly).  And what did the Southern General say in return (yes I know he is not a general, I just enjoy referring to him as that) ":) glad I could be some help to ya, I hope u enjoy your trip to the East Coast, it should treat ya right... def. seem like you will enjoy it, let me know how it goes".  To which I replied "Will do, have a safe trip".  I was a giddy girl, even if he doesn't call or anything I had pulled off the flirty give my number out (but he's gonna call or text right, I mean he's a Southern boy).  I then jumped on my next flight with a big smile on my face when suitor number two sits down.

Suitor number two was about 6'4, strong build, and totally arrogant.  He talked about himself the entire time.  He told me about his 5 houses all over the US, how he travels all over the world, about his car, and his dogs, and his night clubs.  He asked me one or two questions but promptly forgot the answers and continued to talk about himself.  He also was not as subtle as the Southern General (it just has a ring to it) and touched my midriff and side boob... with his hand!!  He was trying to show me something, bold suitor 2, VERY BOLD.  He also kept calling me baby, WTF mate.  I fell asleep as it was the middle of the night, and when I awoke he told me had been watching me and was concerned.  Actually, his exact words were "Morning baby, I was so worried about your neck baby, how you feeling."  As we got off the plane he too walked me to my terminal and insisted I take down his number.  Again I say WTF mate?  I have no intention of calling or texting him, so what good does it do for me to take down his?  So I silly-ly sent him a text saying something like, nice meeting you.  To which A-Hole didn't respond... then why did I take down your number?  Oh well I didn't care, I was still thinking about the general.

All to say I love Southern Men and their Southern accents.  You know who is super Southern and nothing like Suitor number 2?  Yep you've guessed.  Tim Tebow!  Bam every post I shall mention his name, his handsome Jesus loving name!!

Later Y'all (even though I know no one reads this but me!)

PS This is what I do to entertain my roommate, and she loves it!!

Some Thoughts

1.) I love Tim Tebow.  (I have come to believe the lie that if I put the words Tim Tebow in every single post on this ridiculously ludicrous blog, that when people google Tim Tebow, my blog will come up.  That being said it does not make this statement any less true.  I love Jesus.  He loves Jesus.  Therefore we should love each other, and make it legal!)  Also my fav dementia resident refers to him as "Bo-bo" or "Bo-Dee-Bo Dee-Bo Dee-Bo".

2.) When you hit a certain age is it mandatory to sign up for a dating site?  I've got everyone telling me to do it, and typically I give in to peer pressure.

3.) Why do women comedians feel the need to be extra vulgar and have dirty DIRTY DUH-HURTY mouths?!  My theory is because they think they are not as funny as men and feel the need to make up for it, when in reality they aren't as funny as men and those vulgarities are not going to make them funny.  (Not to say that women cannot be as funny or funnier than men, just that these specific women should find another profession).

4.) This man almost hit me with his car when I was running on Tuesday, and today (Thursday) he passed by me on the street and had a big smile for me and gave me a big wave.  I guess we are friends now; that's what a near death experience can do.

5.) I almost hit a man with my car today when he was running and then had to promptly park my car in which I stayed in pretending to be doing important things until he passed by.

6.) Every Wednesday I do "Cooking with Lisi" with my residents (most of whom have dementia) and this past Wednesday we made a delicious Bruschetta.  Before putting it into the oven I sprinkled some mozzarella cheese on each bread slice to which one of my favorite dementia residents yelled out "THERE IS NO SENSE IN MAKING IT LOOK PRETTY LET'S EAT ALREADY!"

7.) My roommate loves her cat.  I am a dog person.  I want to get a dog, small enough to be able to have it in an apartment, big enough to eat her cat.

8.) One of the tool-sheds in the aforementioned blog posts was from Indiana and because he had a country accent and is not from California I assumed he was a Southern Gentleman.  Nope turns out Indian is the Midwest.  Who knew?  Apparently every state but California.

9.) Had a two hour phone conversation with one of my best male friends.  He lives in Hawaii so even if there was interest on either end (which there is not) the distance would stamp that out stat, which brings me to my point: men and women CAN be Platonic friends.

10.) Seriously Tim Tebow, if we went on a date I think you would REALLY like me.  

In Kind Regards,
Lisi (AKA by my dementia resident LuLu, Cecilia, or Louuuuuuuuuuuuuu)

PS I think this is funny and not true nice guys haven't finished last since Jr. High.

Tools

So recently I got angry at the male sex.  The reason being I felt used physically by a non-christian bar hoping male (who is probably not a very gentlemanly person even if he has a country accent) and less than 1 week later I felt used emotionally by a supposed christian male.  It pissed me off and made me believe the lie that men use you; non-Christians physically and Christians emotionally.  In both these tool-shed-esk males defense, I knew better than how I acted and let them treat me poorly, however I didn't ask for it, just allowed it when it began to occur.

The truth of the matter is those two "gentleman" didn't act the way they should have.  They treated me poorly, and hurt me, but they are individually 1 person in a very large population.  It would be irresponsible to hypothesize about a whole group of people based on 1 or 2 tools bad behavior.  It has taken me a couple days to come to grips with that (a couple days longer than it should have) and made me realize those 2 individuals have issues, and I have some issues to allow their issues to hurt me.

That being said women should know that there are good men out there, I am related to some of the best.  I think in hurt and pain 1 or 2 individuals can ruin the good name of others and we should not allow that to happen even when it hurts and even when the thought of letting someone else physically or emotionally close to you again might result in the same pain.  What it can teach us is to be smart ladies!!  Because we are smart, and we fool ourselves into thinking this tool in front of us will not do exactly what you know he is about to do, because you would rather not deal with the ramifications at that moment but they will come later and they will come worse.

That being said, men please don't be tools; don't tell us you will take us to a Laker game when we know you are not going too.  Don't invite us to an intimate dinner for two or a cuddle fest or wrestle match just to get our advice on some other girl and to treat us like an emotional girlfriend.  And again ladies don't let men do this too you!!!

That is all.... :)

PS
This song is hilarious and one of my many many many favs!

Alone

In more ways than one at the moment I am alone.  I have the house to myself this weekend, I'm currently single and the 3 people I would call my "best friends" are spread all across the US.  So I am alone.  Although I think I need to make the point that technically speaking I am never alone because I know and love Jesus and he is always with me, which for a people person like myself, is a relief.

Being alone has brought a wee bit of clarity for me.  Although it may seem like I am an extravert (which I may very well be) I CHERISH these alone times.  I have been able to spend time in my empty apartment cooking, watching movies, kickin it pjs and bathrobes, and not acting as if someone is watching.  However it has also made me realize maybe being alone is not all its cracked up to be.  There are dishes in the sink that when my roommate is home, would never be there because I would do them.  My glass is full of wine, which may not be the case if there was someone who might think that shouldn't be the case (and maybe it shouldn't).  I am making no effort to go out with friends and people I enjoy spending time with, because I have the house to myself and don't need to prove to anyone that I have people to spend time with.

All that being said, none of those above small joys feel as good as when my best friends are having conversations with me on the couch in the same room.  Or someone is holding me making me feel safe, and feeling the physical comfort and security of another human being.  Thankfully as said earlier their is Jesus,  with whom I can depend on when I miss those things.  It is hard sometimes when you can see your "aloneness" pointed out so evidently, but he makes it easier.  Whether this makes me an extravert or an intravert I don't know.  Here are the facts social parties and gatherings I enjoy attending, having my apartment to myself I enjoy.  I will make every concious effort to spend time with said 3 best friends when they are in town, seriously every minute of every day; however I am ok with passing on other social engagements not involving them.  I don't mind being single but I would love to have a male who makes my single status not single.  I don't know what that makes me but I guess I should stop trying to define myself.

I am alone.  I am not alone.  Who knows.  Who cares.  This TRUELY is all the thoughts passing through my head and boy is this post inarticulate.

Lisi

PS
I fell today, naked, in the shower.  I'm fine except for a couple bruises but I guess I don't know what I would have done had I not been ok, little freaky but meh!

Also this is one of my FAVORITE songs, and I felt it was completely appropriate.  Also I LOVE Tim Tebow.

Trendless

As you can see by this blog I am by no means trendy or a hipster.  If I was there would not be a multiple color polka dot background instead there would be a simple and sleek solid color, or a picture of a barn, or an artsy fartsy black and white picture of something.  I am a term I have just termed 30 seconds ago and have titled this blog entry as such; trendless.

If I was truly trendy I would be a "hipster" I would go to coffee shops for atmosphere and organic purposes not for convenient sake (although I am lucky enough to have a very trendy and hipster coffee shop just open up downstairs from me).  If I was a hipster I would wear muted colors and earth tones instead of the bright pinks, yellows, and oranges that fill my closet.  If I were a cool trendy person on the cutting edge I would have a pin-trest and be interested in crafts and etsy.  If I wore muted colors and had black square rim RayBan everyday glasses I would have a crush on a skinny under ground musician, instead I have an enormous crush on an all American, football playing, Jesus loving, hero to many, beefy young man by the name of Tim Tebow.  But most importantly if I were a cool, Oregonian-esk person this blog would be searching for meaning and essentially trying to be deep with no real depth.  Clearly this blog is not that... you can see it, this blog is nonsense.

I will be honest I am not a serious person.  I am not a trendy person.  I am me.  I am honest.  I love Jesus.  Under my religion on FB it says "I love Jesus first and my neighbors second" which is truly something I strive for but many times fail at.  I am trendless and do not see the point in trying to change that, unless for the soul purpose to bring people to that truth; the truth about Jesus.  The problem I have and see is that to be a hipster is to not look up too or idealize anyone, or be following a trend.  Everyone is following a trend where it is trendy to follow no trend, but clearly you can see the trend... understand?  If it was truly cool to not follow the trend I would be cool, but that is not what they are looking for.  So until the trend goes back to being trendy, my being trendy will not promote the one truth everyone needs to hear.  Jesus love you, trendy or not.  He loves you in your olive greens, and your hot pinks, he loves you with your espresso brown fleeces, and your royal blue cardigans, he loves you with your long plain chains and with your conservative pearly pearls. He loves you with your mussed bed head and your layers of aqua-net. He loves you.  There is nothing you can do to make him love you more there is nothing you can do to make him love you less, he is THE constant and that is not a trend.